Reflections From Passover

Each year during Passover I find myself overwhelmed with how vast God’s love is for His people. At the end of every Passover season I find God has revealed some little nugget of truth that will take me months, even years to unpack. This year it hit me as I was leading the Passover Seder at Christian Church of Thousand Oaks (CCTO), Impact CLU’s partner church. 

We had an incredible turn out. I had never lead a Seder for this many people. It was a little nerve-wracking, but so much fun! We had reached the third cup, the Cup of Redemption, which represents the third promise in Exodus 6. "I will redeem you with an outstretched arm.” I shared with our group that God not only was going to lead His people out of Egypt, but He was going to teach them how to live in freedom.  As the words were coming out of my mouth, it was like God was standing in front of them speaking them to me. “Skoutz, I’ve not just brought you out of oppression, but I want to teach you how to live in freedom.” Wow! 

One of the most difficult parts of my transition to California is the tremendous amount of freedom I’ve experienced in doing ministry. I came to this realization early this semester. Very little college ministry has been done here. The only expectation is progress, no matter how big or small. The hurtful voices of past ministry experiences are fewer and far between here. No one has told me I’m sinning by doing ministry because I’m a woman. I have tremendous support from the CCTO staff. I really can’t imagine an environment where I am free to be who I am and to do ministry the way God is leading. 

The struggle comes with the fact that I’ve never been in a situation quite like this before. It reminds me of the college freshman who leaves home for the first time and now has to make all his or her own decisions. It is a tremendous amount of freedom and responsibility. Every freshman responds differently. Some flourish and others spiral down quickly. I’ve been praying that I will handle the new freedom and responsibility well. 

In the middle of our Passover celebration, I realized God has already shown me how to live in freedom. He is just waiting for me to notice. It is the kind of God He is, a god of great compassion and love, who constantly pursues His people. He desires to be with us because He loves us. That brings an incredible freedom! 

"I like your backpack."

I got a great deal on my red backpack when I was in college. I needed a backpack that wasn’t going to fall apart after lugging around multiple textbooks and tons of music. It has far surpassed that need. With the exception of a short period of time as a teacher, I’ve always carried it with me. It has traveled with me to France and Kenya. This summer I will take it with me to the Middle East. This backpack is fantastic, but I’m often asked why I’m 33 and still using a backpack. 

There are multiple reasons why. Mostly, it is convenient and easy to carry.  Once I started doing campus ministry, I discovered it allowed me to blend in with students making it easier to build relationships with them. Today I was reminded of another reason why I enjoy carrying a backpack: it starts conversations.

I walked into my favorite coffee shop and was waited on by a college-aged girl I had not yet met. As soon as I walked up to the counter she said, “I like you backpack. I have one just like it.” I thanked her and mentioned I had been using this pack for several years. She shared a similar story mentioning she got hers when she was pretty young. I told her I loved the back because, until that morning, I had never had even a sign of the fabric tearing even though I had carried it around the world with me. Again, she had a similar story and started asking about my world travels. 

As we chatted a line started to form, so I ordered my drink and moved to the end of the bar. The barista preparing the drinks asked me a few more questions about Kenya. At some point the topic of traveling to Israel came up in the conversation. The man who was directly behind me in line, had already ordered his drink and joined us at the end of the bar waiting for our coffee. He was intrigued by the idea of choosing to go to Israel and joined the conversation asking some questions. 

Our dialogue is now bouncing back and forth between a couple customers and employees and we’ve transitioned to talking about my job as a campus minister. The man behind me asks, “How in the world did you get into that field?” I chuckled a bit and told him it was a fairly long story of me being stubborn. No one says anything, only stares waiting for me to explain. I begin to share and answer questions as they are asked. 

At this point I realized every employee has stopped working and is listening to me. The entire line of customers has shifted their attention towards me. Part of me thought they were all annoyed that I was wasting their time so I tried to summarize a very long process in a few short sentences. I looked past the group of customers who had gathered in line and realized almost the entire coffee shop was listening to me talk. 

“This is so weird," I thought. "Why are they all staring at me? I can’t tell if they are captivated or annoyed. What do I do? Talk about Jesus!” So I did. I very briefly shared about my conversations with God in the process of coming on staff with Impact. I shared about how God doesn’t give up on His creation. Even when we would rather chose to be disobedient, he chases after us and shows us His love. 

The barista hands me my coffee and says, “That’s awesome.” The man behind me says, “Hmm…that is interesting. I hope you have a great trip to Israel.” I responded, “God is pretty great,” and thanked them. Several others nodded, smiled and went their separate ways. All the employees went back to work and walked outside completely amazed and confused by the whole thing. 

My simple red backpack was what started the entire dialogue. It was a casual conversation that ended with sharing about God’s incredible love for us. I don’t know the stories of people in the coffee shop that day. But I do know my God longs for all of us to understand how great his love is for us. He uses kings and beggars, young and old, prophets, shepherds, and evidently red backpacks as a way to make Himself known to us. 

I think I’ll keep carrying my red backpack and praying that I will continue to decrease as he continues to increase. 

Impact the World - Israel 2014

Almost a year ago I traveled with some Impact Campus Ministries staff and students on one of our Impact the World initiatives to help students engage in the call to discipleship through a cross-cultural experience.

Last year I participated in the Kenya experience, and as you may know I was planning on returning this May, co-leading the same trip. Due to some circumstances beyond our control, the mission organization that hosts our group is unable to do so this year. Much to our disappointment this forced us to cancel the trip. However, Kenya is not the only Impact the World trip, and I want to take advantage of the opportunities I have to help challenge students to answer the call of discipleship. This July I will be joining the greater Impact family in another Impact the World initiative to Israel and Turkey.

Marty Solomon, an Associate Campus Minister at Washington State University and University of Idaho, is leading this trip that will focus on the journey of God’s people through the Bible. This is not a sightseeing trip, but rather a very intense study trip with the opportunity to dive into the Text with students in the culture and context that it was written. Just like the Kenya trip, it provides opportunities for mentoring and discipleship beyond the trip itself and challenges everyone in their relationship with Jesus Christ.

In order to be a part of this incredible initiative, I need to raise approximately $5,795 to cover all costs and materials during our time there (July 11-31). I would love to have you partner with me as I continue to Impact the U. Impact the World.

If you would like to donate to this project, you may do so by mailing your check to:

Impact Campus Ministries (indicate “Sarah Koutz’s BEMA Trip”)

PO Box 82925

Tampa, FL  33682

You may also give online HERE.

Sharing My Story

Over the last year Christian Church of Thousand Oaks (CCTO) has had different members share about how God's Story has intersected with their stories. Since I'm partnering with the awesome congregation, they asked me to share as well. Here is my story of being called to do campus ministry. 

Most little girls enjoy playing house or pretending their dolls are getting married and having children. Not me! I pretended I was a doctor, a teacher, a scientist, an explorer, or a minister. On the rare occasion I played with dolls, they became my students or a church congregation. I remember stealing our family devotion book, sneaking into my room and reading the devotions as if I was preaching a sermon to my row of dolls. It was one of my favorite things to do, but it was always done in secret.

In the small farm town where I grew up, women were to have very little to do with ministry outside the kitchen and young children. While I never remember my parents teaching me this, our church seemed to have a way of making sure I was aware and that I was to be quiet in the process.  I had a habit as a child of asking questions, lots of them. Most of these questions were met by reprimands and never answers. So I quit asking…out loud anyway.

By the time I went to college, I had convinced myself it wasn’t acceptable to ask questions and I could never do ministry, so I would be a teacher. As I studied music education, I found myself becoming incredibly successful in the classroom but increasingly drawn to this childhood dream of being a minister. Years of questions stored away in my mind could no longer be silenced. After all, asking questions, searching for truth and discovering who you want to be are critical points of development for any college student. It can be an incredibly difficult journey for many.

In my first few years of college, it became very clear that God was calling me into ministry. I had no idea how I would call home and tell my parents I was going to do something that simply wasn’t acceptable, so I didn’t. I continued to pursue my education degree and basically told God I could never do ministry. It wasn’t a very easy road.

During my junior year, I joined some friends that were starting a college ministry at our church. Serving in that ministry made it incredibly difficult to ignore what God was calling me to do. In a moment of rare courage in my senior year, I called my parents and told them I was going to go into ministry. The call went much better than I had expected. I changed my major. I started a great internship at our church, which would later turn into a part-time position. I graduated with plans to move into a full-time position at the church.

A few days after graduation, I arrived at the church office only to find that there were no funds for the full-time position and my job would be terminated at the end of the week. I was devastated. The next several years were filled of even more questions and lots of waiting on God. I became a band director, a job I really did not enjoy. My ministry now took place in the four walls of my classroom. Most days it felt more like a prison. God and I had several intense conversations during these years.

After a couple years of teaching, I received an e-mail from Impact’s executive director stating I had been recommended to him as someone who would really enjoy campus ministry. I met with him only to inform him I wasn’t interested in campus ministry but rather student ministry, referring to middle school and high school students. A year later he e-mailed again asking if I would join him and a prayer team for lunch because they were going to be starting a campus ministry in our area. I reluctantly agreed. At that lunch a few people on the prayer team asked if I would go pray with them at the University of Notre Dame. How do you say no when someone asks you to pray with them?

My bad attitude and I went to one of my favorite spots on Notre Dame’s campus to listen to God. Approximately ten minutes of complete silence passed and I had a conversation with God that went something like this.

God: Sarah, what have I called you to do?

Me: Student ministry! Could we get on with it?

God: I was just wondering, how many students do you think are on this campus?

Me: Oh…okay, I’ll consider college ministry…I guess.

Less than two months later, after many questions of course, I accepted a position as an Associate Campus Minister on Impact’s South Bend, IN team. My campus ministry journey has been amazing, not always easy, but amazing. I stand in disbelief that God has chosen me to be a part of such a vital ministry. I am humbled at the opportunity I have to partner with CCTO to reach college students at CLU and other local campuses. Most of all, I’m grateful He loves me so much He graciously answers my questions.

Cali Bound - Day 7

As you read in my last blog, we made plans to meet Jennifer this morning and stop by Sweet Cakes to buy some treats for the road. We wanted to help them get some more business because their treats are delicious, so we made this video to post all over social media.



Their treats were great fuel for our trip and we needed it because we decided to stop at Zion National Park to do some hiking before our last stop before Thousand Oaks. The hike was exactly what we needed to be out of the car and in God's creation just listening to Him and being with Him in preparation for our arrival in TO. Here are a few shots from the trip. There will probably be more on Facebook later.

These 3 peaks are called The Patriarchs - Abraham, Isaac and Jacob

I love climbing rocks!

Panorama Fun! Click on it to make it larger.

We arrived in Las Vegas tonight to stay with Gessica's aunt and uncle. We've shared lots of laughs to night. We'll have a leisurely morning here and then head on to Thousand Oaks. We're almost there.